Soliloquy in Sunlight – Part Seven

Soliloquy in Sunlight is a story about Frances Elvin Cornwall, who lived under a great deal of self-exerted pressure.

Part VII:

A lobster caravan. That was what I dreamed about the night before this important day. I specifically remember it. There were at least 50 of them carrying me on their crustacean backs. Granted, we moved at an insanely slow speed, as lobsters are water dwelling organisms, and we were riding along a paved road. I remember having to keep pouring water on them, to trick their bodies into surviving life on land. It was exemplary of suffering. Whether or not a lobster is capable of suffering, I remember awakening with empathy for their misguided mission.
Compassion is said to be the opposite of suffering. Perhaps an individual is not capable of compassion until he or she has endured some significant level of suffering. Being concerned for another’s misfortune or pain is possibly only capable when one truly abandons one’s self. Even though Elvin and I had yet to discuss this idea, every action I ever remember him performing was exemplary of this. Elvin existed under a masterful nature, in which he sought to dominate and surprise everyone in his presence. While frustrating, he always found a way to metaphorically slap you in the face when you least expected it.
“Smelden, you know that I have placed a great deal of blind trust in you by sharing this letter with you.”
“Of course Elvin. I am still trying to make some sense of it, but I feel I am grasping at straws.
“Perhaps the truth will become evident in time. I think you should sit back and watch the scene unfold for yourself before passing judgment. You are a dear friend, so please know that you will always be dear in my heart. Do not evaluate my actions for their surface meaning, but look underneath for their implicit meaning.”

To be continued…

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